Psalm 120 reflections on Chapter 2 of Eugene Peterson's A Long Obedience in the Same Direction

As I read this Psalm over and over in preparing for today, I kept being reminded of another “woe is me” passage in the bible. At first, the connection was tenuous at best. But as I continued to look at the 2 passages next to each other, I saw more and more parallels. So bear with me, and I will try to get to the core of their shared message.

The New Testament passage that kept coming to me as I read Psalm 120 was this one:
Romans 7:19 -25  For I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing.  Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it. So I find this law at work: Although I want to do good, evil is right there with me.  For in my inner being I delight in God’s law; but I see another law at work in me, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within me. What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death? Thanks be to God, who delivers me through Jesus Christ our Lord!

I often read the stories and songs of the Israelites as my own spiritual journey -their battles and failings as my own struggles with temptation and obedience. The lying lips in the Psalm I saw as my own. And the lies are deep within my deceitful heart. These lies gnaw at me and they make me say No to God.  The big lie that the church has bought into hook, line and sinker is that the life of the godly is a life of success, happiness and safety. So when the pain of life hits – we lose someone we love, we feel betrayed, we are lonely in the midst of our marriages and families, we are sick and discouraged – we don’t believe that God is near. Or worse yet, we believe God is near but that He doesn’t care. The pain is the only reality and in our pain, we look for ways to numb.

Addiction can be defined as attempting to control rather than learn. It is more pleasurable to make the pain go away than it is to sit with it and learn from it.  We have lost the art of lament. Some addictions are destructive and life altering and some are more socially acceptable. We know people can be addicted to drugs, pornography, gambling, or alcohol. But we use other things to numb us: food, the internet, fantasizing, television, shopping, work, video games, busyness.

As a young teenager, I discovered the enticing power of sexual attraction.  The way I felt if I could get attention from someone was intoxicating. Flirting was fun. I felt powerful and beautiful. But it wouldn’t last. So I needed a better fix or a bigger risk. This desire to get attention was like a game to me until I started to realize the danger of my actions. What exactly I was playing with. Then I tried to tame it, ignore it. But, I had made a rut in my heart, in my thoughts and with my body that the wheels kept falling into: coming back to haunt me again and again in the form of fantasy or temptation.

When sin is dominating our lives, we are surrounded by lying lips. We are “dwelling in Meshek, living among the tents of Kedar” as the Psalm describes, far from home and surrounded by barbarous cravings. We find this law at work: Although we want to do good, evil is right there with us.  For in our inner beings we delight in God’s law; but we see that other law at work in us, waging war against the law of our minds and making us prisoners of the law of sin at work within us.

We know we are in trouble when we start saying things like: “What’s the big deal?” “I can quit any time” “I deserve this” “I’m not hurting anyone else” “This is just how I am” “I’m not as bad as fill-in-the-blank” “I just want a little relief” “no one will know” “just one more time”

We feel defensive if someone asks us about the behavior, we feel edgy if we cannot engage in it, we think about it when we are doing other things. It has a pull on us that is beyond our control. We call out like Paul, “What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death?” and the Psalmist answers, “I call on the Lord in my distress, and he answers me.”

These Psalms are the Psalms of Ascent – as we learned last week – the Psalms of steps. The first step in recovery is that “We admitted we were powerless over our addiction - that our lives had become unmanageable.” As Eugene Peterson says in this chapter of our book, “[we] have been wrong in supposing that [we] could manage [our] own life and be [our] own god…”

This realization, this shift in thinking is often called repentance. Let’s look at the Greek word that is used for repentance: metanoia – which means literally “change of mind”. It has a counterpart: paranoia “baseless or excessive suspicion” which is the state in which we find ourselves at the height of our addictive behaviors.  Metanoia is not the kind of changing of the mind brought about by will power or moral strength – Recognize here the prefix –meta: the same as in the word metamorphosis – changing from one form to another. Likewise, metanoia means changing from one mind to another. 

Treadwell Walden, a19th century theologian wrote an entire book "The Great Meaning of Metanoia" to describe the power of this word and the inadequacy of the word “repentance” as its translation. He argues that the word repentance gives a completely different meaning to the preaching of Jesus and His apostles. It is the difference between the two statements: "Repent! Feel sorry for your sins" and "Metanoia! Think a new way"! He goes on to describe metanoia as “by far the grandest miracle recorded in Scripture. No exhibition of blank power – not the arresting of the earth’s motion, not the calling back of the dead to life – can approach in grandeur to this miracle which we daily behold, namely, the inconceivable mystery of having written and sculptured upon the tablets of man’s heart a new code of moral distinctions, all modifying – many reversing – the old ones.”

How does this metanoia take place? Let’s look at the physical counterpart metamorphosis as it happens in the caterpillar. The caterpillar phase of life is the eating and growing stage. The caterpillar cannot mate or reproduce. His job is simply to get fatter and bigger. At some point, this can’t go on any longer. And so he stops. And completely encloses himself in a chrysalis. Inside of his new home, the caterpillar digests himself from the inside out, causing his body to die. Some of the caterpillar's old tissues are salvaged to form new. This remnant of cells is used to create a new body.

In Rebecca Hill’s latest post, “The Still and the Absolute” she describes this process:

“It just doesn’t work anymore, no matter hard I try.

I tell Neil again, how I try. I try so hard to stay sane. To stay sober, to stay present, to stay married, to be good.

‘Maybe you need to stop trying.’” 

We need to stop. Enclose ourselves in a chrysalis of union with the God and Father who loves us more than life itself.  As Rebecca goes on to say “Just give up, surrender, be still, because some things are absolute, and I am loved.”

When I am alone with God and genuinely still, sometimes I see myself like Queen Orual standing before God the Judge - but the book I have written is against myself and not Him. I tell him all the ways I have hurt people and walked boldfacedly into sin and thought ugly things and said ugly things and God is listening and I am looking Him in the eyes and telling Him because He already knows. And He lets me go on because He loves me to my very core and He knows how good I will feel when I get this off my chest.  I can do this because I know I am His and because I know He loves me and accepts me. exactly. like. this.

This is step 4 of the 12 steps: We made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves. Frederick Buechner reminds us in his book Telling Secrets: “It is important to tell at least from time to time the secret of who we truly and fully are—even if we tell it only to ourselves—because otherwise we run the risk of losing track of who we truly and fully are and little by little come to accept instead the highly edited version which we put forth in hope that the world will find it more acceptable than the real thing.”

And when I am done telling my secrets to God, we sit together in silence. And it is a good silence because I am known. and loved. And He says to me, “are you done, now?” and I nod and then He says, “good, because now I have something to say to you: The day is coming when you will call me ‘my husband’ instead of ‘my master.’ I will wipe the many names of Baal from your lips, and you will never mention them again. You will live unafraid in peace and safety. I will make you my wife forever, showing you righteousness and justice, unfailing love and compassion. I will be faithful to you and make you mine, and you will finally know me as the Lord.”

Now we see only a reflection as in a glass; then we shall see face to face. Now we know in part; then we shall know fully, even as we are fully known. We do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet he did not sin.  Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.

“Just give up, surrender, be still, because some things are absolute, and we are loved.”

Emmanuel God With Us

Genesis 28:10-18

10 And Jacob left Beersheba and went toward Haran.

11 And he came to a certain place and stayed there overnight, because the sun was set. Taking one of the stones of the place, he put it under his head and lay down there to sleep.

12 And he dreamed that there was a ladder set up on the earth, and the top of it reached to heaven; and the angels of God were ascending and descending on it!

13 And behold, the Lord stood over and beside him and said, I am the Lord, the God of Abraham your father [forefather] and the God of Isaac; I will give to you and to your descendants the land on which you are lying.

14 And your offspring shall be as [countless as] the dust or sand of the ground, and you shall spread abroad to the west and the east and the north and the south; and by you and your Offspring shall all the families of the earth be blessed and bless themselves.

15 And behold, I am with you and will keep (watch over you with care, take notice of) you wherever you may go, and I will bring you back to this land; for I will not leave you until I have done all of which I have told you.

16 And Jacob awoke from his sleep and he said, Surely the Lord is in this place and I did not know it.

17 He was afraid and said, How to be feared and reverenced is this place! This is none other than the house of God, and this is the gateway to heaven!

18 And Jacob rose early in the morning and took the stone he had put under his head, and he set it up for a pillar (a monument to the vision in his dream), and he poured oil on its top [in dedication].

Let’s pray…

Surely you are in this place oh Lord.  Help us to recognize Your presence and to bring Your presence with us wherever we go.  Open our hearts and minds to hear from you tonight. Amen

You may be wondering why this is our scripture reading for tonight. Do you see any similarities between this story and the story of Jesus’ birth? (not a great place to sleep, lots of angels, blessings on earth or peace on earth)

Let’s look back at what happened to Jacob before this dream in the desert. Jacob had been plotting with his mother how he could get the rights as the first son even though he was second born.  In his culture, the first born son would get the larger share of the father’s wealth and also be responsible for carrying on the family name.  Jacob wanted this badly enough to deceive his father, trick his brother and basically risk his safety and well-being to get it.  So Jacob got what he wanted, but the Bible says “Esau held a grudge against Jacob because of the blessing his father had given him. He said to himself, “The days of mourning for my father are near; then I will kill my brother Jacob.”

So Jacob leaves to go to his mother’s family in Haran – leaving his home, his family and the promise with a death threat hanging over him, uncertain of what the future would hold. The first night on his journey, God gives him this amazing dream- a dream of comfort and reassurance. Reinforcing the promises that he had just received in his father’s blessing. And the central picture in his dream was a ladder.

What is a ladder? When do you use a ladder? Think about a rope ladder…when would a ladder be coming down to you? A ladder is not a place to live. A ladder is not a destination.  Who do you know that ever said, “I live on a ladder” or even that they have a ladder in their house that gets them from one floor to the next. Ladders are a way to get from one place to another and not a place to stay for long.  Once the ladder has accomplished its purpose, it is no longer needed. You are safe in the helicopter, you have successfully climbed out of the pit you fell into.  Once the rescue operation has taken place, you are safe and secure – free from danger.

and imagine the empty well Joseph found himself in. It was a deep, dark

In the Bible, we know a story where someone was trapped in a deep pit. Does anyone know who I am talking about? That’s right, Joseph! Try and imagine the empty well Joseph found himself in. It was a deep, dark hole…you could not get out unless you had a rope or a long, narrow ladder. Joseph’s physical eyes could see no way out. All he saw was darkness; all he faced was certain death. And yet, that was not the end of his story. He too had a promise from God, a dream! But only when he was forced to let go of his own way of making that come about does God intervene and save his people through this slave boy, ex-con Joseph.

Can you think of another Old Testament story with a rope? This may not be as familiar to you….there was some spies and a woman possibly not with the best reputation…. That’s right, Rahab. She let the spies down with a scarlet cord and then she left that scarlet cord in the window and when the army of Israel came, they left her house alone because it was marked with the cord.

We see stories of rescue all throughout the Old Testament. The blood of lambs, the whale, the Ark. God providing a way. God’s people in slavery, in rebellion, in need of rescue. 

This is where God enters in.

Think about the way that God enters the world. Through a young woman who is being whispered about and disbelieved. With just a handful of people having the secret revealed to them..  In the least likely of places, the Savior enters into our world, in the flesh as a real baby. Totally dependent on others to carry him into the world. Not in a palace. Not part of an influential family. Not in a prominent city. Entering into history noticed only by some nearby shepherds and an insignificant Jewish couple. Angels ascending and descending all throughout this story. This would not have escaped the notice of Mary – she closely and persistently guarded all these things in her heart.

 

If we find ourselves at the end of our own resources, at the end of ourselves in a deep pit, we find that Jesus is kneeling at the edge of our hole, leaning over, offering his hands, equipped and ready with strong ropes and a long ladder.

station 4: Jesus Meets His Mother

As we begin to look at the 4^th Station of the Cross today, Jesus meets His mother, I want us to look at a poem that I found called “The Sacrament of Letting Go” by Macrina Wiederkehr. Parenting is the long and arduous task of letting go and I think in Mary’s case she had a keen sense of this from the beginning of the journey.

Slowly

She celebrated the sacrament of Letting Go…

First she surrendered her Green     

Then the Orange, Yellow, and Red…

Finally she let go of her Brown…

Shedding her last leaf

She stood empty and silent, stripped bare

Leaning against the sky

She began her vigil of trust…

Shedding her last leaf

She watched its journey to the ground…

She stood in silence,

Wearing the color of emptiness

Her branches wondering:

How do you give shade, with so much gone?

And then, the sacrament of Waiting began

The sunrise and sunset watched with

Tenderness, clothing her with silhouettes

They kept her hope alive.

They helped her understand that

her vulnerability

her dependence and need

her emptiness

her readiness to receive

were giving her a new kind of beauty.

Every morning and every evening she stood in silence and celebrated

the sacrament of Waiting.

I have two beautiful children who love to read! We have been reading the Lord of the Rings trilogy (we are on book 2) and they have read all the Percy Jackson books and some of the Harry Potter series. Recently, we have been watching the Avatar, the Last Airbender and the Legend of Korra TV series.  All of these stories are stories of adventure and quests and heroes and magic. People with gifts and powers willing to fight evil and the powers of darkness! Exciting stuff. Inspiring.

Keep those things in the back of your mind as we look at Mary today.

From the very beginning, Mary knew what she signed up for. She knew it would not be easy. We see her willingness in her response to the angel:

Luke 1:38

NASB

“Behold, the bond slave of the Lord. May it be done to me according to your word”

the Message

“Yes, I see it all now: I’m the Lord’s maid, ready to serve. Let it be with me   

just as you say.”

Phillips

“I belong to the Lord, body and soul,” replied Mary, “let it happen as you say.”

In her song that she sings to Elizabeth, we hear echoes of a song from another mother from ages past, Hannah, a mother who gave her son to God.

When she presents Jesus at the temple, Simeon tells her “This child is destined to cause the falling and rising of many in Israel, and to be a sign that will be spoken against, so that the thoughts of many hearts will be revealed. And a sword will pierce your own soul too.”

When Jesus is missing for three days at age 12, there was a foretaste of agony for Mary. “Your father and I have been anxiously looking for You [distressed and tormented]”

I wonder if Mary prayed “when I agreed to this, I didn’t know it would be so hard”

Did she study the Scriptures about the Messiah, pouring over any passage that mentioned His coming, His purpose, the deliverance of the Jews. Looking for some clue, some indication that she had indeed heard from God. Or did she let go of having to know? Surrendering over and over to what God was doing. “let it happen as you say.”

Did knowing that Jesus was special change the day-in day-out of the 30 years He lived in Nazareth? As year after year went by, did people start to doubt Mary’s story? Did Mary? First she surrendered her Green     

Then the Orange, Yellow, and Red…

The sacrament of Waiting.

The sacrament of Letting Go

Mostly, it seems as if Mary was able to let go of her own agenda. But we see some glimpses in scripture of her efforts to influence Jesus’ ministry. The wedding at Cana shows the relationship between mother and son in an interesting light. Mary seems to know that Jesus is capable of fixing the problem and she also seems to be giving him a little push into His calling. He tells her His time has not come; she tells the servants, “Do whatever He tells you” – she is ready to get the show on the road.

The next time we see Mary and Jesus together, she is looking for Him – and Jesus seemingly does not go to her, instead He says “Who are my mother and my brothers? … Here are my mother and my brothers! Whoever does God’s will is my brother and sister and mother.” Separating Himself from physical bonds and reinforcing spiritual ones.

Finally she let go of her Brown…

Shedding her last leaf

She stood empty and silent, stripped bare

Leaning against the sky

She began her vigil of trust…

It is not surprising that she is in Jerusalem for the Passover – we know that it was her custom to go every year. But this year when she is there, she encounters her son in the midst of a protest rally. He is beaten, bloody, carrying the cross to the place of His public execution. Jesus meets His mother.

She stood in silence,

Wearing the color of emptiness

Her branches wondering:

How do you give shade, with so much gone?

This encounter seems to say “I don’t know what is going on, but I am all in. Where else could I go? You alone have the words of eternal life.”

All logical sense is now gone. The “immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine” is about to happen. The redemption of the world is about to be accomplished but it will cost Mary the life of her son. God so loved the world that He gave His son – but He asked Mary to give her son, too.

He needed a human collaborator to accomplish His purposes as He STILL DOES TODAY!

Mary didn’t have magical powers or a lightning scar. She didn’t airbend nor was she the daughter of a Greek god. She was just an ordinary person willing to be used by God.

And when God asked her, she said, “Yes!”

She said, “Yes” over and over. “Yes” to humiliation and misunderstanding.  “Yes” when Simeon said a sword would pierce her heart. She said, “Yes” when Jesus was missing for three days. “Yes” when Jesus was making trouble with the local synagogue. She said, “Yes” when He was hanging out with “sinners” Yes and Yes  and Yes!

And she said, “Yes” when He was on His way to the cross.

What are you saying to God today? When He asks you to follow Him? When He asks you to sacrifice? to suffer?

Desmond Tutu says this about suffering: “we can transform our suffering into a spirituality of transformation by understanding that we have a role in God’s transformation of the world.”

Often we are hesitant to say Yes to God because we know what it will cost us. Teresa of Avila said to God, “If this is how you treat Your friends, no wonder you have so few!” – but the fear of suffering is much more damaging than the suffering itself.

Father Jacques Philippe from the Community of the Beatitudes writes in his book Interior Freedom,

“What really hurts is not so much suffering itself as the fear of suffering. If welcomed trustingly and peacefully, suffering makes us grow. It matures and trains us, purifies us, teaches us to love unselfishly, makes us poor in heart, humble, gentle, and compassionate toward our neighbor. Fear of suffering, on the other hand, hardens us in self-protective, defensive attitudes, and often leads us to make irrational choices with disastrous consequences.”

The very thing we are trying to avoid is what we are inviting into our lives.

God designed us for adventure; we are inspired as we watch movies of superheroes and magical beings. We walk alongside Frodo on the way to Mordor and fight alongside Harry Potter against the powers of darkness. Our hearts are stirred and we long to be a part of something bigger than ourselves and our ordinary lives.

Jesus said “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me. For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will save it.”

Jesus barges into on our cozy hobbit-hole lives and bids us to come and “follow him” - a robust call to a life of adventure.

I invite you today to look into the eyes of your Savior. Battered and bloody on the way to the cross. Look at Him through the eyes of Mary, with unspeakable suffering, with ultimate sacrifice.

Look at Him with vulnerability

Look at Him with dependence and need

Look at Him with emptiness

Look at Him with readiness to receive

Say Yes to Him today.

Following the Wise Men

Adoration of the Magi by Jocopo and Francesco Bassano

Here is my sermon from this morning Dec 30, 2012

slides for sermon available here

Following the Wise Men

[slide 1]

Preparing a sermon is a strange and wondrous journey. This one has been particularly interesting because the story is so familiar and yet I had never really studied it before. So let’s look together at the text – found in Matthew 2 (this story only appears in Matthew’s gospel) – the first 12 verses

After Jesus was born in Bethlehem in Judea, during the time of King Herod, Magi from the east came to Jerusalem and asked, “Where is the one who has been born king of the Jews? We saw his star when it rose and have come to worship him.” When King Herod heard this he was disturbed, and all Jerusalem with him. When he had called together all the people’s chief priests and teachers of the law, he asked them where the Messiah was to be born. “In Bethlehem in Judea,” they replied, “for this is what the prophet has written: “‘But you, Bethlehem, in the land of Judah, are by no means least among the rulers of Judah; for out of you will come a ruler who will shepherd my people Israel.’” Then Herod called the Magi secretly and found out from them the exact time the star had appeared. He sent them to Bethlehem and said, “Go and search carefully for the child. As soon as you find him, report to me, so that I too may go and worship him.” After they had heard the king, they went on their way, and the star they had seen when it rose went ahead of them until it stopped over the place where the child was. When they saw the star, they were overjoyed. On coming to the house, they saw the child with his mother Mary, and they bowed down and worshiped him. Then they opened their treasures and presented him with gifts of gold, frankincense and myrrh. And having been warned in a dream not to go back to Herod, they returned to their country by another route.

Let’s pray……

“Praise be to the name of God for ever and ever; wisdom and power are Yours.
You change times and seasons; You depose kings and raise up others.
You give wisdom to the wise and knowledge to the discerning.
You reveal deep and hidden things; You know what lies in darkness,
    and light dwells with You.  I thank and praise You, God of my ancestors:
    Please give us wisdom and power and reveal Your Word to us today.

This prayer is based on the one Daniel prayed when he was up against the magi of his time – the magicians, enchanters, sorcerers and astrologers that could not understand the dream of the king. As we look at the story of the Magi who visited Jesus, we see a turnabout of events. In the Daniel story, the magi were the ones excluded from the revelation and now as we look at this familiar story; we see the complete opposite phenomenon: the people of the Book – the scribes – were not the ones with the inside scoop but instead God reveals Himself to these outsiders (something He has been doing all along).  As I studied this familiar story, I found so many theories about the star – a convergence of planets, a super nova, a comet, an angel? So many descriptions of the Magi –, Indian, Arabic, Persian, descendants of Seth, there were 3, no 12, they were many in number, Zoroastrian, kings, astronomers, astrologers? It is amazing how many stories have come from these 12 verses in Matthew. If we were to explore them all we could be here a long time. And yet, no matter how deeply we search, much of it will still remain hidden. This mystery was a gift to me, because I stopped trying to figure out the details of the story and started looking at what God was trying to tell me through it. The result was 3 questions.

The first question is: What are you looking for?

[slide 2]

The Magi didn’t happen by the sign of the star by chance. They were studiers of the night sky – experts who looked at the stars probably every night – trying to interpret the signs: the movement of the planets, the shooting stars, the phases of the moon.  So, I am not an astronomer, and I don’t think that this story is telling us to look for signs in the sky – but where do we look for revelation from God? What should we be studying intently?

In the bible, we find the answer to these questions: Joshua 1:8 says, “Study this Book of Instruction continually. Meditate on it day and night so you will be sure to obey everything written in it. Only then will you prosper and succeed in all you do.” And Psalm 1 says “Blessed (happy and enviable) is the one whose delight is in the law of the Lord, and who meditates on his law day and night. That person is like a tree planted by streams of water…”
 

Astronomy magazine has a sky-studying guide for new astronomers. I found their advice could also be applied to studying God’s Word.  You will find these in your Rev Rag – and they are mostly self-explanatory but I want to explore a few with you.

[slide 3]1. Get to know the sky in a general sense – find a central point and go from there. In the Northern hemisphere, the North Star can orient you to find all the other constellations you are looking for. In the south, it is the Pole star. [slide 4] What is your orienting point in studying the scriptures? God’s love? Justice? Caring for the poor? Holiness? These can give you a starting point to study God’s Word.

[slide 5]2. Immerse yourself in the subject – not just a cursory glance but a deep and purposeful study. The Magi were able to see the star because they were experts – they observed subtle differences, convergences. This is the same with God’s word – it is living and active. You could study the same passage every day and see new things each time. Jesus describes it this way “bringing out of the storeroom new treasures as well as old.”

[slide 6]3. Pick your observing site carefully – if you want to see the moon or the North Star, you can probably just look out of your window. If you want to see the Milky Way, you need to be somewhere away from the light pollution of the city. [slide 7]When we study God’s Word, sometimes we need to get rid of the distractions before we can really see what He is trying to reveal.

[slide 8] 4. Comfort is everything

[slide 9] 5. Keep a log

[slide 10] 6. Become a social astronomer

[slide 11] 7. Observe everything! – not only does God reveal Himself to us in His word – but in nature, in others, in books, in everything – if we are looking.

[slide 12]This leads us to the second question: How far would you go?

Now, with all the theories about where they came from, it is hard to say exactly how far the Magi traveled, but it is safe to say that they covered a considerable distance on their journey – probably well over 500 miles. The Scribes, on the other hand, did not bother to go from Jerusalem to Bethlehem – it was only 5 miles. Imagine an event of amazing significance – it is hard to do in our celebrity saturated culture – but imagine that all of your favorite bands or all of your favorite speakers or great leaders of the world are all converging in Joliet, IL. A group of royalty from Saudi Arabia comes all the way over here with all of their attendants and security guards and motorcades (all of Chicago is being disturbed) and asks you “where is that big event happening? – we heard it was today!” You calmly consult your calendar and answer, “It’s over in Joliet. I’ll print you out a google map.” I think they would be amazed that you weren’t grabbing your coat, dropping your plans and coming along. [slide 13] Soren Kirekegaard says it this way, “Although the scribes could explain where the Messiah should be born, they remained quite unperturbed in Jerusalem. They did not accompany the Wise Men to seek him. //  Similarly we may know the whole of Christianity, yet make no movement. The power that moved heaven and earth leaves us completely unmoved.”

In my research for this sermon, I came across a beautiful poem written by the 13^th century Muslim mystic, Rumi. An unlikely source, but that’s where God always seems to be turning up. [slide 14]

Gamble everything for love
if you are a true human being.
If not, leave this gathering.

Half-heartedness doesn't reach into majesty.
You set out to find God,
but then you keep stopping for long periods

at mean-spirited roadhouses.

Surely we don’t know what we could have? Or we would stop at nothing to have it. Think about all the things we go out of our way to get. The things that occupy our time and our efforts. We set out to find God and stop at the roadhouse of pleasure or the comfort hotel, the looking-out-for-number-1 truck stop or the apathy rest area. God came all the way into our world – made Himself nothing to be with us.
The ultimate romance story of a king disguising himself as a pauper to win the love of the peasant girl.
[slide 15] Frederick Buechner describes it this way “The Word become flesh. Ultimate Mystery born with a skull you could crush one-handed. Incarnation. It is not tame. It is not touching. It is not beautiful. It is uninhabitable terror. It is unthinkable darkness riven with unbearable light.”
Jesus says, “The kingdom of heaven is like treasure hidden in a field. When a man found it, he hid it again, and then in his joy went and sold all he had and bought that field. Again, the kingdom of heaven is like a merchant looking for fine pearls. When he found one of great value, he went away and sold everything he had and bought it.”
 “Half-heartedness doesn't reach into majesty.” God wants our whole hearts.
[slide 16] Which leads to the third and last question: What gifts will you bring?

Another unlikely place to find inspiration was from Brendan Francis Behan, an Irish novelist and playwright. [slide 17] He has this to say about gifts: “If you have a talent, use it in every which way possible. Don’t hoard it. Don’t dole it out like a miser. Spend it lavishly like a millionaire intent on going broke.”

Whenever I think of gifts I think of the song the “Little Drummer Boy”. Wherever I am when this song is playing – I cry. No matter who is singing it: David Bowie & Bing Crosby, Bob Dylan, the Glee cast, ABBA, the Red Hot Chili Peppers, well maybe not ABBA.  What is it about this song? Such a simple message and such a good reminder:

[slide 18] Our finest gifts we bring to lay before the King so to honor Him, when we come.

I am a poor boy too. I have no gift to bring that's fit to give a King. Shall I play for Him on my drum? I played my drum for Him – I played my best for Him on my drum.

This is exactly how God wants us to come to Him. He knows our need, to our weakness He is no stranger. In all our trials, born to be our Friend. Behold your King! Before Him lowly bend!

[slide 19]
The King of the Universe is here.

Are you looking for Him?

How far would you go ?

What gifts will you bring?

Let us pray…..

God of the Universe, guide us as we look intently for You in Your Word, in each other and in our own hearts. Help us to go farther than we think possible in our pursuit of You, in our service to others and in living lives pleasing to You. Help us to bring You gifts that honor Your majesty, worship Your presence and proclaim Your death until You come again. Come, Lord Jesus. Amen

[slide 20]

Benediction:

Since we have the word of God undeniably revealed to us  - give that word your closest attention, for it shines like a lamp amidst all the dirt and darkness of the world. And it will continue to shine until the day dawns, and the morning star rises in our hearts.

This JPUSA Life

I have decided to model my sermon today after one of my favorite radio programs, This American Life. If you are not familiar with Ira Glass and this delightful show - I recommend it heartily to you –and allow me to describe the basic set-up. The show always has an overarching theme – which is the segment’s title and then there is a prologue, and one or more acts dealing with the theme. After each act is a clip of a song that sums up the act and segues into the next.

So welcome to this JPUSA life, I am your host, Debbie Baumgartner. Today’s show is called “Keeping the Peace”. This summer, here at JPUSA, we will be exploring the topic of “calling”. While I think it is essential to identify a personal calling, today I will be talking about a corporate calling, a calling that we share – we find this calling in Colossians 3:15: “And let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts. For as members of one body you are called to live in peace. And always be thankful.”

Called to live in peace. Called to live in peace. What does that mean? Just an absence of conflict – that can’t possibly be enough. In Hebrew the word for peace is shalom. The root of the word shalom means “to make complete or whole.” Greek word for peace, eirene means health, welfare, prosperity, bliss and every good and kindness imaginable

Act One: Permission to Speak Freely

I first heard of accountability from my friend Barb White. Up until then I was sort of hiding behind a good-girl façade and trying to keep up appearances. She was the first friend who actually called me on things that I thought I had well hidden. It was very alarming at first and my initial reaction was to deny the charges and hide better. This proved ineffective and so I started on a journey of transparency to find my true self. Now just to let you know, as Jeremiah 17:9 says, “The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?” so this journey was (and is) a long one and left to myself I would think I am doing pretty dang well. My heart lulls me into a false sense of security and I can see myself as the “good guy” the “poor, misunderstood one” or the “martyr” and get away with a lot of ugly living.

That’s why God sent me here to JPUSA. Living so close with people it becomes impossible to hide. I could do it for spurts or, if I didn’t get out much, for a little longer; but eventually my true colors would show and someone would see them. And the gig would be up. I was caught red-handed and faced with some choices: point the finger at someone else or own up. The pointing the finger thing started with the first two humans and hasn’t let up. There are so many options these days for the blame game – parents, teachers, pastors, friends, the government, bosses; the list goes on and on. Being the victim worked for a little while, but at some point when I was left alone with myself, I longed to be known and I longed to change.

Making peace with myself would require a clear sense of my strengths and vulnerabilities. This clarity could not come from myself alone – I am unable to see myself clearly. Through God’s word and prayer, I gained a lot of truth, but God also sent me some wonderful women to speak into my life and to help me know myself and begin to do some deeper work.

When you invite people into your life to speak truth, you have to be ready to hear it. It sounds so nice and easy, but “I want you to tell me when I am acting badly, but I will bite your head off when you do!” is not going to work. I invited several women to speak truth to me and guess what! They do! And then I have to receive it. Yippee! Last year, Andrea Spicer and I had a real nitty-gritty talk like this where she brought up some areas in my life that needed to be worked on. I have known Andrea for more than 15 years and she has helped me through some serious trials. We have talked about many topics and hashed out many things over the years and yet, and yet, I did not want to hear what she had to say.

The next few days after this conversation there was a serious battle for my mind. Part of me just wanted to go home and lick my wounds and tell myself how misunderstood I was. How she didn’t really see me. How I had plenty of people who would tell me otherwise. Oh and then it got really ugly – I started picking apart her character! Who is she to tell me this or that – what about the way she…. Wow. Really?

The other part of me let the truth sink in. Took deep breaths. Listened to the love and nurture of a long-standing friendship – a friendship deep enough to speak the truth, and I felt myself coming to a new level of peace with my inner wounds. Looking at them for what they were in all their ugliness and letting Jesus look at them with me. In the Amplified Bible, our verse starts out “Let the peace that comes from Christ rule” “(act as umpire continually) in your hearts [deciding and settling with finality all questions that arise in your minds, in that peaceful state]”. This is the place to start if we are to live in peace with one another.

“Peace Train”

Act Two: And the Second is Like it

I was leaving Arai school one Sunday morning in a foul mood. Seeds had played at the end of the worship service and the set had ended with them singing “love your neighbor as you love yourself, love your neighbor as you love yourself” and I walked out into the sunny day and thought “no!” I don’t want to. Well, so because I have this accountability relationship with Andrea – I went to confess my ugly heart. Suzanne Stewart had just moved 10 feet away from me, and although we were friends, our friendship wasn’t easy. I am so blunt and loud and opinionated and she is not. We had different views on politics and parenting and world events and ideologies, we could get into arguments over the stupidest things. And then things would be tense but we wouldn’t really resolve it – just pick up and move on.

And to be honest, it was mostly my fault. I think I was pretty mean – or at the very least I was shutting her down. And I would justify my behavior with some nonsense but if I talked it out with Andrea she would try to bring me back to reality. So finally I had to face it – I was being a jerk and I had to cut it out.

Many years ago at a summer camp, one of my counselors gave me a very useful tool for changing my thinking about someone. So I implemented it with Suzanne. Let me share it with you. It looks like this: I WILL BE patient with _________I WILL BE kind to _________I WILL not envy _________I WILL not boast about myself to _________

I WILL not be proud around _________I WILL not dishonor _________I WILL not BE self-seeking, but look out for ________’s interests,I WILL not BE easily angered by _________I WILL keep no record of _________’s wrongs. I WILL NOT delight in evil but rejoice in the truth about _________I WILL always protect, always trust, always hope, always persevere in my words, actions and prayers concerning __________

Now let me tell you, if you want to hold on to your bad feelings about someone, praying this prayer will not let you do that for long. I prayed this every day. And it wasn’t long until I saw Suzanne. Really saw her for the gift that she is. And I also saw how she had never given up on me. How she kept coming in my room. Kept entering into conversations. Kept giving me cards and gifts. Kept praying for me and being kind to my family. Kept calling out the good things in me in spite of myself and my bad behavior.

It’s not perfect, but it has been many years now that I have seen our friendship as a treasure. We fought for it and we let the Holy Spirit unite us. It wasn’t enough for either of us to co-exist. We didn’t choose each other as neighbors but I know it wasn’t an accident. “As members of one body, you are called to live in peace.”

“Why Can’t We Be Friends”

Act Three: You Got Some Splainin’ to Do

The last part of the verse says, “And always be thankful.” Nothing makes us more thankful for community than going through a difficult time. Tiana was just telling me that while the whole community was up-in-arms about the clean team changes, she and Dave had just learned that their son was autistic. She didn’t have any energy or desire to enter into the discussion. Someone commented to her “you are living real life” - but that’s always true…while we are arguing about cleaning or dogs or woodchips or the paint colors for the dining room – people around us are living real lives. Battling addiction, going off to college alone, trying to save their marriages, suffering from illness – drowning, not waving. And when the enemy can keep us squabbling over little things, he is delighted. And the people struggling, who need us to be a strong harbor, they cannot get our attention.

I want to end this morning with a piece that Rebecca Hill wrote for the Wilson Station site. Maybe it will help us to be more thankful… it is called “Let Me Explain”

I always have to explain. My autistic son goes to a special school; we deal with a lot of therapists, doctors, social workers, etc. They get that frozen smile, usually, when we tell them we live communally. We call it the ohmygodtheyliveinacultthisisawkward face. When they get to know us, and realize that I am the not exactly a mindless submission kind of a girl, they begin to ask questions. Questions like, “how in the world do you all get along?” “Don’t you wish you had more privacy?” “Do you get tired of living with so many people?”

The answers, are, respectively, we don’t, yes and no, and no. We don’t all get along, we drive each other crazy, and I long to be alone sometimes, but when I am, I don’t like it much, and I want to be surrounded by people who know me, and love me, and get me, and it is worth it. What I give up to live here, it is a pittance, really, compared to the richness of this life.

It is a process, a tapestry, a journey and a fight to the death, a circus, a picnic, a tent revival and a rock concert. It is Bible camp and a college dorm, a PTA meeting with all those people you would just as soon avoid. There are snacks, lawn chairs, water fights and a rummage sale. You spend hours picking through the refuse for a treasure. You beg God to help you see the beauty amid the chaos, you love your friends, you hate them you can’t believe they would be such jerks and you pray and hold vigil and love them with every ounce of your being when they hurt, when they fall. You thank God with every breath that they are with you when your child is sick, when your father dies, when you do something so stupid and sinful that you wonder how you will get up and brush your teeth and function tomorrow.

You wish everyone could know this kind of love, this unconditional love that gives you just a taste, just a glimpse of how God loves you, what His heart is.

It is dirty, messy, chaotic, and beautiful. It is your friend who you have known since you were both teenagers crying on your shoulder and then laughing until you hurt because she reminded you of how you once had a crush on a guy with a blue mohawk.

It is not having to explain.

It is good, it is terrible, it is easy, it is like climbing Mount Everest, and it is mine, all mine.

I don’t say all that, I just say, it is family, one big messed up family. This seems to be enough, and then I go home, which is a relief, because when I get there, I will not have to explain.

“We Can Work it Out”

sermon handout and link to audio version

link to audio version click HERE

1 Corinthians 13:4-7

New International Version (NIV)

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

I WILL BE patient with _________

I WILL BE kind to _________

I WILL not envy _________

I WILL not boast about myself to _________

I WILL not be proud around _________

I WILL not dishonor _________

I WILL not BE self-seeking, but look out for

________’s interests,

I WILL not BE easily angered by _________

I WILL keep no record of _________’s wrongs.

I WILL NOT delight in evil but rejoice in the truth

about _________

I WILL always protect, always trust, always

hope, always persevere in my words, actions

and prayers concerning __________

Hidden Eternities

sermon slides here if you click on this link to open in a new tab - the slides go along with the sermon

[slide 1]
2 Peter 3:14-18 (New Living Translation)
14 And so, dear friends, while you are waiting for these things to happen, make every effort to be found living peaceful lives that are pure and blameless in his sight.
15 And remember, the Lord’s patience gives people time to be saved. This is what our beloved brother Paul also wrote to you with the wisdom God gave him 16 speaking of these things in all of his letters. Some of his comments are hard to understand, and those who are ignorant and unstable have twisted his letters to mean something quite different, just as they do with other parts of Scripture. And this will result in their destruction.
17 I am warning you ahead of time, dear friends. Be on guard so that you will not be carried away by the errors of these wicked people and lose your own secure footing. 18 Rather, you must grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.
All glory to him, both now and forever! Amen.


Let me start out with some math lessons today. They involve zero and infinity. The void and the eternal. Very spiritual concepts but also very familiar to the mathematician. Throughout history there have been some well-known mathematician who were also theologians: Blaise Pascal is probably the most well-known. He is best known for describing our need for God as a God-shaped hole in our hearts that can’t be filled by anything other than God. Pascal was also the father of the principles of vacuum and proved, despite opposition from leading scientists and philosophers of his day, that vacuum did exist – everyone in that time was terrified by the void – nothingness – vacuum –Aristotle’s famous quote "Nature abhors a vacuum" is not entirely true. The vast majority of the universe is more or less empty space and there doesn’t seem to be anything rushing to fill it. To his credit, there are circumstances that do fit this description, but what Aristotle and the leading thinkers of his time were trying to avoid were nothingness and, its partner, eternity.

Eternity is hidden in the strangest places. [slide 2] Measure the distance across any circle at its widest point and now measure the distance around the circle. These two distances can be accurately measured with the correct tools – but something crazy happens if you divide the larger distance by the smaller one – no matter how big or small the circle – the answer will always be the same. And it is not a nice number [slide 3]– it is a number that never ends and never repeats – a little bit of eternity hidden in a circle – since we can’t write a number like that we represent it with a symbol – π [slide 4]. The same thing happens with a square. [slide 5] We have a nice neat perfect square – we can measure the length of a side – they are all the same – let’s say 1 foot long – now we can draw a line from one corner across the square to the other side. Easily drawn and impossible to measure. Again, we find an eternity hidden in this seemingly simply object. Poor Pythagoras was determined to find the ratio but in the end (after drowning a fellow philosopher for suggesting this truth) he had to admit that it was indeed ‘irrational’ – a messy number with infinite, unpredictable digits.

My favorite hidden eternity in math has to do with dividing by zero. When you divide a number, say 1 for example, by zero you are asking “what number multiplied by zero will give me 1?” a question that has no answer because you can multiply by zero all day long and get nothing but zero. BUT we can get really really close to zero say 0.00000000001 and when we divide 1 by this number we get 10 billion – so we add more zeros – 100 more zeros before the 1 and now we are getting ridiculously large numbers when we divide – so as we get close to zero – we are approaching infinity. If we apply this mathematical concept to Einstein’s “field equations” [slide 6]which illustrate the spacetime fabric being curved by matter; we find solutions that approach infinity which give us a simplified description of what we now term a ‘black hole.’ [slide 7]Since density is defined as an object’s mass divided by its volume, when a large star dies, it’s volume (the space it was occupying) decreases – in fact it reduces nearly to zero, and the mass remains fairly constant and so the resulting infinite density of the black hole is similar to division by zero. But because of this immense density, it has a strong gravitational field and any object (even light) that gets close to this hole will be pulled in and compressed into a single point that is infinitely small – sounds a lot like zero.

So even if you have understood nothing of the math I have shared with you today, hold on to this thought: the creation of a black hole happens when a star dies - a massive nothingness pulls down on space and time with a force of gravity so strong that it basically compresses itself to nearly nothing –– all that is left is that strong force – sucking in anything that comes too near the edge.

Pascal’s God-shaped hole idea is found in his writings in defense of Christianity, entitled, Thoughts or in French, Pensées: [slide 8]
"What else does this craving, and this helplessness, proclaim but that there was once in man a true happiness, of which all that now remains is the empty print and trace? This he tries in vain to fill with everything around him … though none can help, since this infinite abyss can be filled only with an infinite and immutable object; in other words by God himself." - Blaise Pascal, Pensées

He said we had an infinite abyss. Sounds a lot like a black hole to me. A hole created by the death of the perfect relationship with God – destroyed by sin – and all that is left is an empty print – but this emptiness has a pull that will suck everything into its strong force – every relationship, every desire, every pursuit – and compress it into nothing – all that will remain is that force and its never satisfied hunger. Should we join Paul in saying “Oh, what a miserable person I am! Who will free me from this life that is dominated by sin?”

The answer, according to both Paul and Pascal, is the Infinite – God Himself.
So how do we do fill this abyss with God? Our text today has some excellent advice. “Make every effort to be found living peaceful lives that are pure and blameless in his sight.” This sounds great. But unfortunately it leads to two extremes. The “make every effort” extreme and the “pure and blameless in his sight” extreme.

Peter mentions something to this effect in the next few verses “those who are ignorant and unstable have twisted [Paul’s] letters to mean something quite different…this will result in their destruction.” We see in Paul’s letters how he feels about the “make every effort” extreme which we will call “legalism” – or a rigid following of rules. “If I am still preaching circumcision, why am I still being persecuted? … As for those agitators, I wish they would go the whole way and emasculate themselves!” Strict adherence to rules is not a way to fill that black hole with God. We can join the rich young ruler and say to Jesus, “Teacher, all these [commandments] I have kept since I was young.” But we will be found lacking. The law wasn’t given to us so that we could have a holiness checklist of do’s and don’ts. The law is meant to show us God’s perfection and our imperfection. The Law is the measure of God’s holiness – an infinitely large number that, even if we spent every waking moment counting, we would never reach. It’s like we are trying to solve a cosmic equation [slide 9] { me + x = ∞ } - the only solution is something infinite – because we can add any number large or small to infinity and the result is still infinity. So God solved this equation Himself by becoming a man and perfectly fulfilling the law so that the new equation looks like this [slide 10]{me + ∞ Jesus = ∞ holiness}.

This leads to the other extreme, the “pure and blameless in His sight” extreme, the “I’m saved so it doesn’t matter how I live” extreme, we will call ‘antinomianism’ [slide 11]– lawlessness. Paul had something to say to these people too, “What then? Shall we sin because we are not under the law but under grace? By no means!” This extreme is an immature response to God’s grace and forgiveness and leads to rebellion. It is like the Prodigal Son using his renewed position as son to invite his old friends over to party. Alfred Norris says “Though there is everything to be lost by rebelling against the Lord Jesus, we can be absolutely certain that, so long as there is human nature, for so long will obedience be irksome and rebellion attractive.” Oh, the rebel – how we love thee. “Prone to wander, Lord, I feel it, Prone to leave the God I love” When we justify our godless actions and entertain our lawless thoughts we grow ever closer to the edge of that deep aching need of our soul and, if we are not careful, the pull will be too great and we will find ourselves destroyed by that which we desired.

[slide 12] We can often feel ourselves close to the edge of this cosmic waterfall and, even though we paddle with all of our might, the pull is stronger than our ability to fight it. “Be on guard so that you will not be carried away...” Peter says in our text. Don’t go near the edge, guard your salvation, be wise about the company you keep so that you don’t slip and fall. Rather, he says, preferably, grow in grace, grow in knowledge, GROW UP! Fill yourself with infinite truths.

How do we do this? By living in eternity. By practicing the presence of God. By storing up treasures in heaven. By setting our mind on things above. As C.S. Lewis puts it by “listening to that other voice, taking that other point of view, letting that other larger, stronger, quieter life come flowing in.”

In my job as a math teacher, I am reminded of hidden eternities – mysteries so vast that we replace them with symbols so that we can apply them. Where are your hidden eternities? Do you find them by looking at the stars or a leaf? Keeping death daily before your eyes? Imagining heaven? Talking to God? Talking to each other about God? When people are in love, almost anything can be a reminder of the other. When I am away from my family, there are a thousand little things that remind me of them. And it’s surprising how much their names come up in conversations with those around me. Because my home is with them and I long to be with them.
It is the same with God. He is crazy about us. Psalm 139:17 says “How precious are your thoughts about me, O God. They cannot be numbered!” And He has placed infinitely many reminders of Himself around us so that we don’t lose sight of Him. Our text begins with this thought, “And so, dear friends, while you are waiting for these things to happen, make every effort to be found living peaceful lives that are pure and blameless in his sight.” The things we are waiting for are described in Revelation 21 “God’s home is now among his people! He will live with them, and they will be his people. God himself will be with them. He will wipe every tear from their eyes, and there will be no more death or sorrow or crying or pain.” A mystical and eternal union of God and man.

A here-and-now example of this is Brach and Hannah – who are getting married in February – they are looking forward to their day. They are buying the things they need and fixing up their apartment and spending time together. They are not making a list of do’s and don’ts NOR are they seeing how much they can get away with before they tie the knot. This looking forward, this waiting, creates in them a deep desire to be pure and blameless.

While I think I could end here and have covered the whole text, I missed a deeply significant part of it. And I would have missed it entirely if I had not elicited some help from my students for this sermon. I handed a sheet of paper with the scripture to a few of my students and asked them to write down their thoughts and return it to me. And all of them zeroed in on a part of the text that I skipped right over: “remember, the Lord’s patience gives people time to be saved.” A thought that we see earlier in this same chapter “The Lord isn’t really being slow about his promise, as some people think. No, he is being patient for your sake. He does not want anyone to be destroyed, but wants everyone to repent.” One of my students put it this way, “if you haven’t led a perfect life – it is not too late and don’t tell yourself it’s too late to turn to God and repent” and another underlined this portion of the scripture and wrote “comforting”. Another student said, “He gives mercy and forgiveness to those who still looking for God and those who aren’t on their best.” But my very favorite (I know, I’m not supposed to have favorites) and I will end with this quote, was what Ellen wrote (she told me I could use her name) “We are so blessed to be with such a forgiving God.”